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A Pennsylvania crusader has slapped Google with a $5bn lawsuit, claiming that the world's largest search engine is endangering his personal safety.
With a suit filed in federal court, Dylan Stephen Jayne insists that the company is guilty of "crimes against humanity" because its name turns up when his social security number is scrambled and turned upside down.
Google sued for 'crimes against humanity'
Seeded on Fri Sep 21, 2007 5:20 AM EDT
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- Public Discussion (24)
By calling itself Google, Jayne argues, Google has exposed him to attack by an army of culturally diverse, net-savvy terrorists. "A person regardless of race or religion that wishes to cause acts of terrorism would look for social security numbers that are made readily available on the public use databases," his suit reads.
And he's adamant that if Google claims ignorance, many people could end up dead or buck naked. "The 'I don't know' defense obviously is a waste of money, time, and puts the lives of Americans and illegal aliens at risk of death or serious undress."
- 2 votes
#1 - Fri Sep 21, 2007 5:22 AM EDT"Crimes against humanity" are grave crimes that refer to deliberate mass killings and other genocide-like acts. The term should not be used lightly and is totally inappropriate here.
- 3 votes
#2 - Fri Sep 21, 2007 5:53 AM EDTWhat's more interesting is actually how vulnerable major corporations are to trivial lawsuits from nutters.... and of course how courts occasionally do end up backing the nutter. Not that I think that will happen in this case.
Whatever the outcome, Google will probably have to spend tens (or hundreds) of thousands preparing a defence.
- 2 votes
Google won't spend a cent in the sense that we think of it. Google has lawyers on retainer. These are high-caliber JDs who get paid to rain down legalistic vengeance upon those that might choose to tangle with Google.
Someone with a very expensive law degree and a nice job at Google is gonna have this dropped in her inbox today and it's going to be the talk of the office espresso bar for the rest of the week.
- 4 votes
Now this is a funny article! I can't believe this will ever see the inside of a court except to dismiss it. Dear God, I hope that's the case...
- 1 vote
#3 - Fri Sep 21, 2007 6:04 AM EDTI actually read through (almost) all of his motions. Easily among the funniest PDFs I've ever seen; I'm thinking about saving them.
All of his motions are handwritten (and badly so). He also makes bizarre and unrelated claims about being mistreated in jail. My favorite part was his motion to expedite payment:
The ever present possibility of restructuring the Laws of Pennsylvania puts the plaintiff in grave danger by the Community, it being so small of a town.
And that's why he wants Google to hurry up. Specifically, he demands a check for $250,000 immediately, and the remainder in a check to follow. Oddly, his demand for a check for $4,999,750,000 seems, in context, unremarkable.
Oh, and for those interested, he's 25. Ladies, I bet he's single too!
- 3 votes
#5 - Fri Sep 21, 2007 9:50 AM EDTI read his handwritten motions as well, and was almost chortling while I decided who to email them to first. The whole thing was funny until I saw them and realized how seriously mentally ill this man is. It's just sad.
- 3 votes
Okay... I admit it. I've been wondering all afternoon about
and puts the lives of Americans and illegal aliens at risk of death or serious undress
and I'm stumped. Anyone got any clue how Google causes the aliens to get seriously undressed?
- 1 vote
#8 - Fri Sep 21, 2007 10:59 AM EDTJust Google "sex positions", some of the weirder ones might cause both death and undress at the same sordid time!
- 1 vote
Blimey! People do that?!? Or maybe that's just the aliens...
- 1 vote
another fruitcake on the run, at least he was nice enough to tell the world that part of his SSN number is
376006 (stand on your head or type into a calculator and turn upside down)
but come on guys !
'crimes against humanity'
Don't Tase Me Bro is all I have to say to this guy...
- 2 votes
#9 - Fri Sep 21, 2007 12:46 PM EDTtell the world that part of his SSN number is 376006
If only he were that sane. His SS# is 166706077. One of the 7s is an L, two of them together (mysteriously) form an E. The other 7 is coupled with a 6 as a reference to the Philadelphia 76ers. I'm not sure their relevance. It's all on page 18 of this PDF.
- 1 vote
That PDF and my Laptop (or IE 7.0) didn't seem to get along to well, everything came to a grinding halt....So I'll trust you on the odd numbering theory.
Sounds like Google will be spending some money on this one to clear up the mess, but sounds like the poor guy needs some help himself.
- 3 votes
Not to get too off-topic, but I used to hate PDFs. They were always a huge, slow pain. Then I got a Mac, and now I love PDFs. It's really amazing how much better the experience is. And then there's the two-finger scrolling trackpad, which in my opinion is the absolute best method to scroll anything that's wider than your current window (and miles ahead of a stupid "hand" tool).
- 1 vote
Really ? Thats interesting as I always keep Adobe updated, yet PDF's always take forever to load and I just hate working with them and especially the hand tool ! I have used CTRL-ALT-DEL so many times on PDF's and there are so many .gov records on PDF it drives me nuts. I am heading to the Redmond Mac store tomorrow to get my Saturday Playtime in (Maybe get a iTouch.....)
- 2 votes
Tedd, the difference is that the native rendering engine of the Mac's 2D graphic layer is PDF. Harks back to the OS's origin as NextStep. PDF has to be smooth and fast on the Mac: I don't even have Adobe's PDF software installed and just use the OS' native capabilities to display them.
- 1 vote
AdipicAcid, Ahh, Ok that explains alot. Thank you as I had thought that a connection existed with the Mac, but was not sure what it was as years ago when I worked for GTE and we used the Mac to lay out the Yellow Pages it was all PDF files, however I don't remember any use of Adobe software at the time.
- 2 votes
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